Alone

So I am drunk (this will have to be the disclaimer as I am too drunk to type all of the “I am not to be held accountable for anything I say” shit).  I went out this evening with two amazing people, and I am attracted to both of them.  I know that they only see me as friends, and I know that I cannot expect them to change to anything more, but I still feel that I am getting the short end of the stick.

I care for both of these women, and I want only the best for them.  Yes it’s true that I feel sexually attracted to both of them, but that is not why I am depressed.  Let’s say that I was invited back by “Seattle”.  I would not have been depressed if they said that they really liked me (as more then a friend), but they did not want to have sex; they just wanted to sleep next to me and wake up in my arms.  I would have been fine with this.  I know that my friend Ben is currently calling me a pussy, but that is besides the point.  I really just yearn to be wanted; not just sexually, but emotionally.  I want someone to have the urge to sleep in my arms and feel safe.  I want to be invited back to someone’s bed just so we can sleep peacefully in one another’s arms.  Is this too much to ask?!

So I will not allow this post to continue forever, but I hope that everyone out there understands what it is that I am looking for.  I just wish that the people that I liked would see it too.  Night all…