The start of the quipist

I cannot believe the amount of people that I dislike in this world.
Every time I blink the number seems to grow without reason.
I am here to vent my disbelief at the amount of stupidity in this world.
See, being violent does not work well with a pacifist …

SNL Induced Thought

I often create conversations in my head.
This is one of them.

Me: Hello how have you been?
Other Me: Good, how is life treating you?
Me: It only hurts when I laugh.

I hurt for a while after this.
I think the Other Me was my ex girlfriend in a conversation that I was hopeing would happen.

This made me hurt even more.

“Please Turn and Cough”

Today, I am a man. Work has not been good to me this month. The money supply is low. To fix this I decided to sign up as a student patient for the University of Nevada, Reno’s Office of Medical Examination (a.k.a. OEM). My job was to go into a cold clinical room, undress, and have six (yes I said six) first year medical students perform a genital and rectal exam on me. They were under the direction of a very nice and kind 4th year medical student, but it was still the most interesting thing that I have ever done. The genital exam was not that bad (with the exception of the hernia test. This is where they stick their finger in a guys genital canal, right behind the scrotum, and have you turn and cough), however the rectal exam was not as easy. The first years did not have the “touch” that they should have had. It was rough, it tended to burn sometimes, and one guy missed by TWO FULL INCHES! He hit the bottom of my balls! Now, I am not a medical student, but I at least know where a human rectum is. I am done ranting, I will go back to my normal poems now, but I had to tell that to anyone who cares.

p.s.-Incase you cared, I got paid $60.00 and hour to do it, so it was worth it for an extra $120.00!

Random Picture

My Europe Trip

For those of you that don’t know, this past summer I went to Europe for two and a half weeks with a friend of mine. I did not have this blog at the time so I just emailed everyone about my wanderings. Now that I have it I am just going to copy and paste the emails that I sent to everyone here. C’mon, you all know how lazy I am, did you expect anymore?!

Email #1:
“Yay for Europa! I am having the time of my life here! This is my trip so far:

-Monday the 7th: Arrive in Paris, find Mary-Ann, go to the hostel to check in, go to the arch de triumph, go to the Eiffel tower, go to the louvre, go to St. Chapel’s Cathedral, and go to Notre Dame. I am sure that I am forgetting things but I will supplement this later with pics.
-Tuesday the 8th: Left Paris and went to Versailles and had a blast. The palace of Versailles is where they signed the treaty of Versailles ending WWII. Moreover, MA’s like greatx5 grandfather was the first painter\decorator to king Louis XIV, so alot of the art work is done by him.
-Wednesday the 9th: Took a sleep train from Paris to Nice and arrived early morning. I have to say that Nice is one of the most beautiful city’s that I have ever seen. There is not much to do but it would be great to live there. This is where I have the most pics from. I mean c’mon, it is right on the French Rivera!
-Thursday the 10th: Took a sleep train to Veneizia. This one was nice. It had a sink, a mirror, no screaming kids … In Veneizia we went to The Basilica and cathedral for St. Marco, we had Pizza and Gelato for the first time in Italy! It is soooooooooooooo good! My favorite Gelato is Lemone! Then we went to our hostel that has a bar in it. After taking full advantage of that we went to bed.
-Friday the 11th: Took a 5hr day train to Roma. Got in to town, checked in. After this we met with a few friends for some drinks and I met two Americans from san fran and to guys from Holland. After bush bashing for a while (NO ONE here likes him), we retired to our beds.
-Saturday the 12th: We got up and hit the town running. We went to the Vatican and saw the Sistine Chapel, St. Peters Basilica, Michelangelo’s dome, and the Rafael Rooms. The line to get in was like 1.5 miles long, wrapped around 3 walls of the city and took us 1.5 hours to get through. After that we hit Trevi Fountain, the Spanish Steps, and the really cool Cappuccin Crypts wherein these monks have taken the bones of the deceased and made a mosaic with them on the walls, I have a post card since we could not take pictures. When we got back to the hostel we got changed and turned right back around to go with our new found friends to a pub crawl. These things are great! I paid 20 euro to have all you can drink beer wine and cocktails from 9pm-10pm. I had these drinks in the Plaza in front of the Colosseum! After that we hopped to 5 different bars and pubs where you got a free shot at each bar and reduced prices because you were with the crawl. Needless to say “I came, I saw, I crawled!”
-Today the 13th: We got a bit of a late start after last night, but we went to the Pantheon, the Roman Forum, The Colosseum, and the Circus Maximus There was sooo much to see that I could have spent 3 days here. Now we are waiting for our train to leave for Florence. Over all it has been a great trip but I am tired. I will write again soon but now I must go catch a train! Caio!”

Email #2:
“So here is ths story of how I almost died in Florence:

-Sunday the 13th: We got on a train late at night to go to Fireneza station SMN. We then had to take another night train to Figline Valdarno, a little backwoods town outside of Fireneza. We then (being the able students that we are) missed our stop and ended up in San Giovanni a 20 min. drive from Figline Valdarno and no way to get there. The trains had stopped, the bus had stopped, there were no taxis, and no metro. We were screwed. Then out of no where these 2 Italian guys and an Italian girl came up and asked if we were ok. We told them what happened (they did not speak very much English and my Italian is worse), they offered to give us a ride to our hostel site for 20 euro (26 USD). It was soooo weird because it was like 1am here and these ppl were just offering us a ride. I was reluctant but I decided to do it. Everything turned out fine and they only charged us 10 euro because they were nice but it was still creepy and I thought I was going to die that night, lol. The funny ending to the story is that today the 14th we were at the Cathedral de Santa Croche (where Michelangelo is buried) and we saw them again! Over all they are good people but I will be worried if I see them in Bern, Switzerland! Well I am off to get some great Pasta and catch a train to Bern but Ciao for now!”

Email #3:
“So my new favorite place in the world is the haufbrahaus in Munich! Only in a place this great can a person get one liter of awesome beer, four sausages, mashed potatoes, kraut, and all of the drunkin’ singing Germans they could ever want. I was in heaven.

However, I did do other things in Munich. I went to this castle (the name I am not going to try and spell) that was the inspiration for the Disney land castle, it was beautiful. Also we went to the Dachau camp that was the first Nazi camp of WWII. It was so sad to see the things that went on there. Now it is off to Berlin to see the wall and other cool stuff but I hope everyone is ok and safe and I will write again soon!”

Email #4:
“So my trip has come to a close. I am in an Inet Point in London right now killing time before my train leaves for Paris. I will then spend a night in Paris, then my flight will take off for the states. Now where did I leave off …

Berlin-In Berlin we did a good few things. We started the day off at 5am in a cafe in the train station where we planned our day … for two hours. At 7am we walked to the Brandenburg Tor (gate). The gate is the symbol of Berlin and became the symbol of the wall during the cold war. This gate was the place that everyone celebrated at when the wall ‘came tumbling down.’ we also saw the Parliament and it’s big glass dome, the wall it self, Europe’s largest dept. store, and a really cool street fair. Over all, Berlin is a town with a lot of history and too much to see!

London- After about 15hrs on two trains we ended up in London. Here we truly flew through the town. We started off by going to the British library and seeing all sorts of famous stuff. We saw that Magna Carta, some of the original Bibles, the original Alice in wonderland, some music composed my Mozart and Beethoven, and the original Bible printed on the Gutenberg Press. Then we went to the London eye (worlds largest Ferris Wheel, it takes 30minutes to go around and is 450 feet tall!), and got some great shots of the city. After that we crashed and got ready for the next morning. That morning we went to Buckingham palace for the changing of the guards, then we went and got the classic picture standing next to the guards that don’t move or blink. After that we went on an open top bus tour of the city where we saw some of the lesser known sights. Then we got off at Parliament to see Westminster Abby and Big Ben. Then we got on to a river boat down the Thames where we saw London Bridge, Tower Bridge, Shakespeare’s Globe Theater, and the Tower of London. After that we rushed over to St. Paul’s Cathedral and bounced to Abby Road (can’t forget the Beatles!). We then went to a traditional London play called the Mousetrap. This play is the longest running play in history at 54 years at one theater. It was a classic murder mystery and it was great. After that we got a Pimms and a beer at a local pub called the Bear and Staff and made it home to bed.

This is my trip so far but I will try to write in Paris but if I can’t I will write when I get back! Bye everyone!”

Email #5:
“I am home again and classes have started. I friend of mine told me that Europe is an addiction. Once you pop the fun don’t stop. I am going to start planning my next trip that I will take back in about 2.5-3 years. This time I will save more for the trip! Any way, thank you for all of your support everyone, it really meant a lot! I am glad to be home and am excited to see all of you again. Remember you have my email and all of my contact info is below, so make sure I hear from y’all. Also, my space is at http://www.myspace.com/maciasd if you want to see pics I will be loading different sets once I get all of them together. Have a great day and I hope to hear from you all soon!”

So there was my trip. It was the trip of a life time and I plan to go back as soon as possible. I will have pictures on my site as soon as my friend, Mary-Ann, gets them to me. Until then, cheers!

Influence

I rented a great movie the other day that made me want to share my pathetic thoughts with you (all two of you … if I am lucky). The movie was ‘Igby Goes Down’

I have now seen this movie three times now and it still holds a place as one of my five favorite movies of all time. Not because of some neo-political point that it makes (though I could make one from it). I do not love it because of the extremely beautiful and wonderful Claire Danes. Nor do I love this movie because of its gripping story line. I love this movie because of the caustic, albeit hilarious, one liners. The writers of this script should be canonized for their grip of cunning linguistic debauchery. Here are some examples of what I am talking about: (thanks to IMDb for the use of their great resource)

Sookie: What kind of name is ‘Igby’?
Igby: The kind of name that someone named ‘Sookie’ is in no position to question.

D.H. Banes: I believe, umm, that certain people in life are meant to fall by the wayside; to serve as warnings to the rest of us; signs posts along the way.
Igby: To where?
D.H. Banes: Success.
Oliver: Our father would be a ‘slippery when schizophrenic’ sign, for instance…
[pause]
Oliver: … along the highway of life.

Igby: She’s a dancer who doesn’t dance and her friend is a painter who doesn’t paint. It’s kind of a Boho version of the Island of the Lost Toys.

Igby: Oliver is majoring in neo-fascism at Colombia.
Oliver: Economics.
Igby: Semantics.

Igby: How many Vassar professors and intellectual theologians beget nymphomaniacal, pseudo-Bohemian JAPs?
Sookie: I am not a JAP.

Igby: It’s ironic that the first time in my life that I feel remotely affectionate for her, is when she’s dead.
Oliver: You beat up her corpse.
Igby: I know, but after that.

Oliver: [on Igby] I think if Gandhi had to spend a prolonged amount of time with you, he’d end up beating the shit out of you, too.

Sookie: You call your mother “Mimi”?
Igby: “Heinous One” is a bit cumbersome.
[Sookie nods]
Igby: And Medea was taken.

Sookie: You know what I think when I’m this close to another body? I think one day at one moment… this body that I’m holding in my arms will stop breathing… stop living. Just… stop. One day you’ll happen upon my name in the obits and you’ll remember this moment when we were so close.
Igby: You’re a real fuckin’ upper.

Sookie: Dimebag… well that got your attention.
Igby: Pavlov’s pothead… I hear the sound of a bong clink and my eyes begin to water.
Sookie: That’s funny.

Igby: Can we go back to your mom’s apartment and have sex?
Sookie: No! You think that’ll make you feel better? It won’t. It’ll just make you feel really empty and sad. You’re better off masturbating.

Igby: Are you a vegetarian?
Sookie: Why would you ask that?
Igby: I’ve just never seen anybody roll a joint like that.
Sookie: What does that have to do with being a vegetarian?
Igby: Oh, they’re just so precious.
Sookie: I roll perfect joints.
Igby: I’m not putting them down, they’re incredible.
Sookie: Well, thank you.
Igby: It’s incredible that a human being can make such neat, little joints.
Sookie: You make it sound as if I’m anal or something, just because I know how to roll a perfect joint.
Igby: No, not anal. Vegetarian.
Sookie: Well, what does that mean?
Igby: Well, you don’t roll like, big rasta spliff joints, do you? Your joints are like salad joints, not like a big, sloppy, bleeding cheeseburger-that-you-rip-into-kind-of-a-joint joint.
Sookie: I guess marijuana isn’t a visceral experience for me. Sex is for me.
Igby: Right.
Sookie: Ok, so I am a vegetarian, but for purely moral reasons.

Peeka: Lucky Charms?
Igby: What?
Peeka: Fucking Lucky Charms!
Igby: I don’t know.

Sookie: [to and about Ollie] You’re the fascist brother.
Igby: He prefers young Republican.

These are just *some* of the amazing quotes from this movie; a movie that all must see. However, I feel more than love for this movie. I believe that, for me, this was a life changing event. I have always thought of myself as something more than the average human being. I know that this sounds fucked up but I feel that I have something that not many other people have; the ability to turn my “give-a-fuck’ off at anytime. I can say things without regret or remorse. I also tend to say witty things that make people laugh and also cry at the same time. Moreover, I cannot be offended. The only problem with that is that I then tend to offend people, but then I just turn off my “give-a-fuck,” and it doesn’t matter. Am I my own fucked up version of a sophist? Fuck …

Decisions

It never fails. As soon as I think I have everything in my life figured out (except for that damned rubrics cube!) something comes up to rock my world. I have been in contact with one of my good friends sister (for the sake of privacy, I will call her Ms. Mraz). I am really starting to have feelings for her and we seem to get along really well. This all seems well and good until I say that she lives in a different state. This is the part where my best friend, fuzzy, tells me to move on and not to get too attached. That would them make this the part where I do not listen to him, and go and to something crazy and off the cuff; like move to Washington. I have been wanting to move for a while, but did not have motivation enough to do so, until now. Here I stand with a great apartment, a great job, great classes, and the only thing that I can think about is moving. Is there something mentally wrong with me that I have to run away from the normal? (don’t answer that, fuzzy … ) The only thing currently keeping me here is that I have not spent any real time ‘with’ Ms. Mraz, only time on the phone and a lot (and I mean A LOT) of texting. Also, I guess that I am not quite over the crush I have on mystery girl (here and after, ‘Poland’). I just got back in touch with her again and I still get the butterflies. However, once again, I was let down after being ditched. She makes the second girl in a month that has flaked when we were going to meet. The other girl that did it, ‘Java,’ did it three times before I gave up. I cannot give up on Poland, however, it is just to hard. She is just so sweet and amazing …

Washington is looking better every day …

Testing the water with both feet

The Temperature of the water

So here is the plan for the life shifting event that I want to undertake. I want to move because it is overall a better choice for me. The schools are better than in Reno, the Clark Community College wants to give me 1,500 dollars to debate for them for a year. Also, the jobs are better. I could get a job with the embassy suites in reservations for $11.50 an hour. The job would be just outside of Vancouver in Portland OR and that is quite a bit more than I make now. Also, I have an opportunity with a possible love interest up there, which (as you all should know) is very important to me. Overall, I cannot find a downfall to Vancouver … save one; my wonderful friends. Fuzzy, Kattitude, Kaninka, Shananaginz, and all of the people at the Dojo are going to be so hard to leave. I am also going to live farther from my Dad than I have ever lived before and this scares me.

I need a change though, I feel like this city is drowning me in a pool of its filth. I see so much behavior that I do not agree with. For instance, I was on the bus during VD and I overheard a woman BRAGGING about how she duped her boyfriend into thinking that she was going to be at her mothers while she was actually cheating on him at the Adventure Inn!!! I thought to myself, “While sad, I will find this behavior anywhere I go.” However, when I heard FOUR OTHER WOMEN brag about how, they too, would be cheating that day, I realized that this has to be a product of a town where nothing is sacred. Everything is an illusion in Reno, nothing has meaning. People that come here do not want a real and caring environment, they want cheap sex, booze, and entertainment. Not only are the people that live here more than happy to give that, they end up living that life style themselves. I am soooo sick of this mentality in a populace. I do not think that I can take this for another five years, until I am done with my Masters. I want to live in a community where the main purposes are education (college town), and raising a family (white picket fence idea). I see this in Vancouver. I have some friends that live there and I have studied the town extensively and have decided that I could be happy there. The real test is going to be when I visit over spring break and see if I like the environment and ‘feel’ of the town.

As far as the logistic of the move go, I am still looking at ideas. If any of you have any suggestions, please let me know!

Damn, I’m going to miss my friends …

Personal Meme:

Here is a picture of me in my new hat. I love this hat, it will now become part of me. Enjoy the sexiness!



I do not know if I like the backwards look, it will take a while to decide.

Someone WILL Loose Their Job For This

Today has been one hell of a day. I did the usual “go to class, sleep, dick around on the computer, insult fat people, come home” shit, but when I got home there was a surprise in my mailbox. No, I did not get an unexpected shipment of glow in the dark condoms from Rip n’ Roll. I got a $1000.00 online shopping spree from Nissan of Reno. It is not the best deal, I still have to pay shipping, but I can get a full leather trench coat for $29.99 (anyone want one?).

After a great dinner with my father at Indian Kabab, I went home and checked my mail to find an out of place letter.

Before I continue, I must tell you about my follies to establish credit. I have been trying to establish credit since I was 18. My father has terrible credit, so having a co-signer was never an option. I was on my own to get a credit card. I have applied for every card that I thought that I could get, and was turned down for all of them. Finally about two months ago, I got a card offer from capital one and thought is odd seeing as just the month prior they had turned me down. I applied anyway hoping that there might be a slight chance in hell that I would get approved. Well, after that I forgot all about it.

It was not until today that I remembered it. I opened a letter that I got from Capital One telling me that I could increase my credit limit to $500 by using my card ending in **** (ya right, I am not retarded!). I was blown away. I thought to myself, “I have a credit card?!” After calling and confirming, I was approved for a $400 limit, preferred card one and a half months ago, and did not even know it. So they are sending me the Card via express mail and I will load it in to my wallet a happy person.

Someone is going to loose their job over this decision …

To Define

os·ten·ta·tious (ŏs’těn-tā’shəs, -tən-):
adj. Characterized by or given to ostentation; pretentious. See Synonyms at showy.
The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition
Copyright © 2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company.
Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.

soph·ism (sŏf’ĭz’əm)
n.

1. A plausible but fallacious argument.
2. Deceptive or fallacious argumentation.

Influence 2:

I have finally finished a movie that I started on Decamber 27th, 2004. The movie is Requiem for a Dream and my assessment; Holy Shit!



When I first saw the beginning of the movie, it was around midnight and I was both high and drunk during my senior year of high school, so I could not pay that much attention, but I remember being disturbed by it. I remember that while I was watching it, thoughts of my family ran thorough my mind and the last thing that I wanted to think about while trying to make a move on a girl that I liked was my family. The written introduction of the move (as worded by netflix) stated that there was ” No middle ground here; you’ll either love or hate Requiem for a Dream.” That could not be any fucking farther from the truth. The ‘middle ground’ that I am standing on right now is not know what the fuck I think of the movie. I know that because of it I have NO desire to do uppers and downers (christmas trees) nor do I care to shoot up. I have smoked weed and I can drink like a fish, but anything out side of that and you might as well stick barbwire up your ass; you’ll get the same end results. I am not sure how many people out there have seen it, but if you have I would love to hear about your experience while watching it. I quite frankly could care less what the fuck you were doing unless it was interrupted by the complete shocking nature of the flick. Please comment below!

All of you did this to me … . thanks, I needed it.

I hit a road block. Ney, I hit it at mach 5. I really like to write and express myself via this wonderful medium, but I have not been able to do so whenever I thought about the readers. I had to get over the fact that there are actually people reading this e-rag and just let my self go. In light of that, I would like to announce that I am back to my usual self and with the normal David comes this disclaimer:

The views that I may express here are not intended to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside. I say what I want, when I want to say it, and if you do not like that you can go and take a long walk off of a short cliff. I reserve the right to bitch, moan, degrade, humiliate and generally act like a raging dickhead. I promise that I will always think about what I am saying and try and say it with some sort of intellectual merit. However, on the occasions that I do screw up, and you alert me about it, you will receive this response; “fuck off.” By reading the spew that appears here, you accept these terms and conditions.

VisualDNA

Here is a little more on what makes me, me! Check out the profile page at the site I made it at, it is right on about me!